Yes! I am in pain again.Each day goes with the slowness, that only a heated day and sweaty night can ensure.Sleep does not come easily.After four days of indifferent and restless sleep of nominal hours one night ,sleep that rare guest will come.Next day I do wake up without headache.
Preparations for the day is done and when one is about to feel a little restful,this pain comes.It comes with that intenseness that is gripping your innate being.again restlessness and no amount of writing will give solace then.
The slow ebbing of the painful soul is achieved by just shutting one's eyes and seeing nothing.You do not want the world then with you.Outside the window the flowers are golden yellow and it falls.The street side is golden yellow too,with the half dried flowers in the intense heat of the sun.The after noons are just silent and serene and shimmering heat.Just heat and nothing more.The pain ebbs a little now.
One has to live with this pain to know its nature.it comes unexpectedly and you have to welcome it and brace yourself for it to subside too.Physical pain one can deal with the tablets.You swallow one and can hope for respite .But mental pain.....How do you cope up.Just wait.It will ebb like a low tide leaving the shores.Just then the sun comes up.Another day and another matter surfaces.You are your own again and the pain of living dead is no more in you,at least just at that moment.You are then face to face with God.
Jayamala.
Blogs That I Follow.
- http://navallanga.blogspot.com
- News Item That touched Me ....There was one article in this month's Reader's Digest about Kamalbhai Parmar who is running a fabricating unit and who runsa school,rather a tution school for the poor students in Ahmedabad.It takes a large heart to start something like this.I do wish I can do something like that too.Atleast be able to teach in such effort .
- Books That I am reading now.....I am reading "Under Orders" by Dick Francis.Just started.Seems to be about issues in racing sport.
- News Items That Touched Me Today----The bicyc;e scores over train and car in a survey conducted for two wheeler travel ina congested metro like New York as the fastest transport..
- Movies That I Liked.....I watched a Malayalam Movie called'Vastu Hara' in Kairali T.V.yesterday.The story touches about losers who migrate abandoning their personal properties during divison of countries and realtes to the creation of East Pakistan called East Bengal dividing Bengalis .Also running underneath the main issue is the personal loss of property which gets rejected by the Mother in the story who is offered the same back by her Husband's relatives.
- Books That Are My Favorites----Somerset Maughm's short stories,Arthur Conan Doyle's 'sherlock Holm mysteries',All of Shakespearian dramas,The Bronte sister's writings,Poems by Mathew Arnold and Tagore's 'gitanjali'.This list is not exahaustive.
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